Feminism and the art of choosing battles

Indira Nooyi’s interview a few weeks back drew a lot of attention from social and media hawks. Not surprisingly though. When one of the world’s most powerful businesswomen speaks, it usually makes for a meaty news. And when the conversation travels beyond her office to her kitchen, it can be fairly juicy as well.
 Seemingly an innocuous avowal, her statement ‘women can’t have it’ all whipped up frenzy of sorts, with ‘Social Eagles’ , tearing her apart for their piece of flesh. Too much for mere selection of wrong words!

Chauvinists smugly took delight in the ‘validation’ of their anachronistic beliefs and the over-zealous flag bearers of Feminine rights were astonished by the ‘blasphemy’ committed by their most priced ambassador. Whilst the former have never made any bones about their views on the fairer sex and are usually given short shrift, it’s the latter that ended up, unbeknown to them, revealing the frailty of their conviction.
Something that should have been passed off as a common agony of any busy senior executive of a global organization, triggered a panic, prompting defense like a culprit desperately fending off an allegation.
 After all, men can’t have it all too. Max Schireson, CEO of a leading Database company quit a high paying job as it required him to travel more than 300,000 thousand miles this year, leaving very little time for his family.
This is not the first instance of over reaction from the self-appointed emissaries of Eve. The recent Airtel ad has become their latest smashing board slamming it as outrightly ‘regressive’.

 Here's how the ad rolls (An excerpt from NDTV.com)
  A perfectly turned out super-boss asks her team to get a job done the same day. She indicates that "can't be done" is not an option. The boss leaves while her subordinate is hard at work. Alone in the office, he gets a call from his wife who is whipping up dinner for him. She suggests he abandon work and come home to a great meal. For good measure she video calls him.

Peeved by the wife’s dinner making act, gang of hyper feminists have snubbed the script for stereotyping women. This allergy to kitchen smacks of fanaticism defining emancipation in very narrow terms. It also insinuates against the working women who have taken to the dual role by choice. What this holds for a housewife  is anyone’s guess.
 This version of equality also has strong undertones of hatred for males resulting in competition and comparisons. Therefore, any depiction of women that deviates from their tunnel vision, seeking to mirror the male archetypes is slammed as an act of discrimination. Blinded by obsession, they fail to foresee that benchmarking men runs the risk of stripping women of their individuality, the very essence of empowerment. Feminists must understand that it is not a zero sum game where the rights for women can only come at the cost of men. It is rather a function of mutually accepted arrangement enabling uncontested co-existence of both with their own set of successes and struggles owing to the choices they make. I know enough working women who would rather prefer sweating for domestic errands than toiling in air-conditioned offices. And there are enough men out there who are being equal partners with their working spouse in household chores. It’s all about the freedom to make the choices and not the choices made.
Am I claiming it to be an ideal world? No. But are we getting there? Yes. Until then, the feminist brigade would do good to choose their battles to fight, lest the world starts giving them short shrift as well.

Sharing is Caring

A long time back I watched a movie wherein the male protagonist advised his dejected female counterpart to find a quite place and scream out her frustration, and she did. In the subsequent narrative, the Scream and Shout therapy seemed to work for her, at least to vent out her anger. The same therapy is being increasingly practiced in another world, though the space is anything but quite; and it seems to not just vent but also empowers. Yes, I am talking about the buzzing world of Social media where people are increasingly turning up to talk about their encounters with the corrupt and the miscreants. Finally, there‘s a lot more to facebook newsfeed than ‘see how hep my life is’ or witty one liners. From self promotion to Self empowerment, status messages and tweets have come a long way. Hitherto helpless,the common people seem to have found a new source of energy in the social media that amplifies their voice to lend it a reach and impact. How this power galvanized people in Arab Spring is well recorded for future history books. While that was the case of people coming together for a common cause with an equally strong external political support, the recent evolution is all about the collective strength of people, driven purely by empathy and shared sense of agony to help the cause of one person. Social media is perhaps one of the last frontiers where people are ready to take up the cudgels for someone absolutely stranger, if the cause resonates with them. Buoyed by this new found strength, the common man is no more quietly succumbing to the blows of high and mighty. I have witnessed day to day frustrations of a common man, like corruption, police high handedness, deceit and many such devious encounters, increasingly finding space and solidarity in the virtual world. This phenomena of dragging the unruly elements from the dark and fortified corners of our society to an open world of social media has the potential to contain their promiscuity. It might not bring a revolutionary change into our lives in near future, it will definitely sensitize the future generations to the need to behave better. I hope that the more discernible threat of instant defamation in social media will work better than the fear of an amorphous supreme power and certainly more than the easy-to-buy law enforcers.

FIGHTERTAINMENT

Amartya Sen’s Argumentative Indians have finally graduated to the next level. Arguments are for weak. We are at the cusp of a resurgent India which is strong and can express itself in better ways than just a difference of opinion. While our infatuation with disagreement is legendary, it is our new found love for giving it a fight, quite literally ,which is bringing the next wave of laurels. We might not see eye to eye but can surely match a punch to punch. With utter indifference to the reasoning, our daggers are never at rest. Scripted or real; amongst the groups and within the groups, the fight goes on unabated. From Hallowed parliament hall to the ‘famous’ road rages, we are putting up a show-down at any place that lends itself to the profound act We are becoming a nation of rowdies that are not just constantly at fight with itself, buoyed by false sense of pride in it’s unbridled individualism and might but also the one that revels in the spectacle of belligerence. Television channels seem to have quickly picked up the spirit of the times and are dishing out a healthy dose of content to whet our appetite for belligerence through their version of fightertainment . Full of Verbal acrobats, fightertainment is exhibited with a clinical deftness in our news channels and reality shows. So called debates break into an incredible clash of vocal chords with the first sound of bugle rung by a hapless moderator. Participants turn into warriors, wielding their lethal lexicon storm into each other throwing choicest of innuendos like stinger missiles resulting in nothing but an incomprehensible concoction of squeals and screams. Reality shows are no less martial, where an oral contest, albeit of a different sort is played out amongst the judges relegating the contest of ragas to its befitting insignificance Considering the TRPs this pandemonium production generates, din seems to be the ‘order’ of the day and you better agree with me else…..

Putpocketing In London....Big deal..Huh!!!

A recent initiative by a Broadband company in Britain has set quite a few tongues rolling. It is deemed to be a great act of generosity by a corporate house to heal the damage inflicted on the corporate sector’s image by the current financial crisis. Some 20 Ex Pickpockets have been hired to sneakily slip money ranging from £5 to a £20 in the pockets or bags of Britons.

http://optimistworld.com/Talk-Talk-Put-Pockets-pick-pocketing/

Media has been all gaga over this exercise terming it to be never –done-before kind of act. Chill folks, we Indians had cracked this way before. Yes, now we can also self-righteously blame the Goras of plagiarism.
If you have narrowed your whodunit guesses down to some NGO or social worker, you have got it all wrong…
The honour goes to our esteemed netas who have been doing this for a long time.Unlike some random corporate house of Britain which woke up by once-in- half-a- century recession to dole out some petty cash , they make it a point to shower their ‘hard pickpocketed money’ every five years.
Over the years they have been far more thoughtful in understanding the need of common man and have expanded their roster of offerings by TV,s , free food and yes of course, uninterrupted supply of our ‘National drink’.
So please take it easy fellas ..you are just a new kid in the block and have a long way to go. May be a word or two of advice from our Politicians may teach you better how to give it back…

A Letter to the Serial Kisser

Mr Hashmi,

I am a big fan of yours and have drawn a lot of learning and inspiration from your Kissing crusades.
You have placed the profound art of smooching into an elevated pedestal, rescuing it from the darkness of tinted Car windows and obscurity of the corner seats of theatre.
Not only me, the entire nation owes you a great deal for providing us with the vicarious sensuous pleasures long muffled by the kill joy of roses, marigolds and other vegetations.
Trust me, I have also showered you with my complete affection and didn’t leave any stone unturned in reciprocating for your generosity of lending your chops out for our amusement so often.
I have religiously watched your movies without ever watching out for your religion.

I was highly dismayed to see your Lokhandwala dreams trashed ostensibly, due to your religion.

You were disenchanted by this outright renunciation and cried foul over this discrimination in front of Media. This stirred up a storm of sorts for a few days and catapulted you to the front pages as a poor victim of prejudice against Islam in India.

However, shedding tears publicly for partisan behaviour ( That too without much credible evidence) may have helped you garner some placatory words of sympathy but nothing beyond that.

You should have better known that it is not a problem pertaining to a particular religion but afflicts everyone with a surname not appetizing enough to some group or the other.
I myself have been denied a flat because of not belonging to a particular sub-community of Hindus.
There are a large number complexes dedicated to a particular religion, community and the number is rising.
It would have been better had you positioned your resentment against this larger practice of compartmentalization on the basis of various groups, that is munching into the foundations of the nation.
Instead of summoning your celebrity status to provide juicy religious inequity oriented story to Media, you could have been a flag bearer of this noble cause and done a far better service to this country
Even if you did not want to stick yourself out for a public service like you pop out your lips, a letter to the housing or Home ministry of state, marking your resentment would have solved your purpose.

If anything, all that your behavior has done is made the lunatic fringe elements waiting like hounds to pounce on these issues , malign India’s image and vitiate our communal harmony.

In the end, I am sad that this Residential aspiration of yours remained unfulfilled. But I hope it has brought you a learning that its easy to play a Hero in reel life by shaking ones butts, but to become one in real life, it’s the guts that matter.

Yours Truly,

An Indian
Religion – Doesn’t Matter

Waste Book !!!

Like my contemporaries of the internet age and the social networking culture I also follow the ritual of beginning my day by paying obeisance to facebook. Here, I am greeted by tons of information in various hues and forms- or should I say fonts- wishing me good morning and smirking at my helplessness .

Following are some of the examples

• “Peter took the quiz what were you in your past life” (and result is that , you were the same ar****le as you are now )
• Mohini changed her profile pic ( 6th time in as many mins)
• Mahesh Became member of the group ‘I Shit everyday’
• Vishal is pulling his hairs out ( Just reached puberty and is all zapped by this new development )
• “Rohit took how well you know Meenakshi (His girlfriend) and the result is just 10% “(Now he will get a strong kick between his legs)

A very significant amount of time on internet is being spend maneuvering through this rabble and scrolling up and down a few kilometers of cyber space everyday. (I wonder if loitering around is a crime in cyber law)

The need to communicate is becoming an addiction to express. It seems people, who are generally calculative with words and expressions, constrained by societal norms , are expressing themselves with vengeance in these social platforms.
This development however, is leaving enormous amount of residue in the form of trivial quizzes, synthetic status messages and useless groups. Zillions of man hours are being spent in processing this Toxic waste of information. I wonder if there is any parallel in the history of this kind of wastage of Human time and effort in producing something so much without value.
Internet is one of the cruelest paradoxes of our times. It has brought tremendous amount of useful information (Like this blog ;) ) accessible and people together. However, the pollution of these information factories (read social networking sites and other such forums) has started affecting our collective productivity by providing us a readily available tool of distraction and procrastination.

I would like to quote Doris Lessing,2007 noble laureate in literature.

“We have never thought to ask, how will our lives, our way of thinking, be changed by this internet, which has seduced a whole generation with its inanities so that even quite reasonable people will confess that once they are hooked, it is hard to cut free”

Though I do not completely agree with Lessing , lest be labeled as the cranky, insecure creature from dark ages, her argument does merit some attention from the intelligentsia.

This inexorable rise of internet waste may soon reach alarming levels with adverse affects more perceptible than now. The only way to contain will be to exercise self restrain. Once a week off from the social networking and chatting would not be bad for a start.
I am sure if someone wants to reach you for all its worth and urgency, will catch hold of you any how and vice versa.

NRI - Non Respectful Indians ??????????????

“We were booed by the Indian supporters when we walked in to the ground .It was very shocking to be hard done at in your own country” Said Paul Collingwood crossly during his victory speech after prevailing over India in the 20-20 world cup match.

This has come very close to the heels of the highly controversial statement of Nick Griffin, head of right wing British Nationalist Party. “There is no more space for any one in England, be it green, brown or yellow “stated griffin impertinently.
Whereas Griffin’s misguided and short of sanity comments were clobbered hard from political commentators across the world, Collingwood’s poignancy failed to make much of the score.
It is really agonizing to be booed in your country by the crowds supporting the opponent side. It is all the more heartrending when it is done by the diaspora living off the political, social and economic resources of the host nation.
The excitement and overcharged emotions of Indians living in England watching their home country play in a crucial match is understandable.
But the pouring forth of the overflowing patriotic sentiments in the cricket ground by hooting against the host team is incredibly antagonizing act that smacks of the insensitivity and ungratefulness of our much-loved NRI’s

Not only this kind of acts provide fodder to the Xenophobic hidebounds like Griffin for their propaganda against the emigrants but also sows the seeds of misgivings among the liberals who have embraced the people of foreign origins respecting their original ethnic identities. What else could justify the maiden victories of extremist British National Parties in the European parliament seats?
One owes some respect for the land they have made their home especially as a choice which should get manifested in these moments of truths.
I reiterate that there is no wrong with supporting your native land over your emigrated country but a certain sense of restrain in the frenzy must be exercised. Infact, it requires a serious introspection if this control is enforced out of fear or ingratiation and not as a natural outcome of appreciation
For those who have not been able to harbor and imbibe that respect must understand that the green cards and permanent residencies they yearn for and proudly wear on their sleeves to make some material karmas, do merit some responsibility and dharma.